I’m glad I had my silly high-on-sugar party for one yesterday because yesterday evening turned out to be awful. What happened hurt someone I love deeply, and here I am in Wellington in lockdown, unable to go to them. I had literally no sleep last night and I’m feeling wired and exhausted despite the daytime nap I’ve had, and at the same time wishing so badly I had a boxing bag nearby so I can take out some of this fierce feeling on it.

Life continues to happen, doesn’t it, regardless of this lockdown parentheses we’re all in.

Dark arguments play out, people hurt eachother with fierce intention, tears get shed. Stars look sharp and shiny in the dark of the very early morning. Cats take up half the bed. Daylight comes too quickly. Eggs get cooked, coffee gets drunk, work gets done, friends and family get called, possible futures are discussed, love gets made. More chocolate gets eaten. And then oh yes of course why not, someone else you love gets sick on another island. Whether you like it or not, everyday the shape of your life shifts. Again and again, until you’re dizzy from it.

This is how it is, this beautiful awful brutal delightful life. Always a rollercoaster. It’s just that right now we don’t have much to distract us from the up-down-twists of how the car is turning on the circuit.

[Scribble 2020 is available as a limited edition studioprint]

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